Blogging, Life, & Responsibilities

Tuesday, January 08, 2013 9 Comments A+ a-

I’ve given a lot of thought to this post.  In fact, truth be told, its constantly on my mind, in the dark corners where the spider webs collect dust.  That nagging thought and question about what I’m neglecting, and how I can reconcile this space on the internet and the rest of my life.  How does one find the time to blog when there is laundry to fold and put away?  There’s the constant need to sweep up the crumbs that have fallen in the 40 minutes since the last sweep, the bathrooms can always use a good cleaning, and I should probably take care of the smell emanating from the refrigerator.  And I can’t forget the bills to pay, the calls to return, the Littles to watch, the homework to help with, and heavens, I really need to take down the Christmas tree and decorations.

But its been over two weeks since I last posted.  And I miss this place. 

I’ve been blogging since the fall of 2005, a month before Devyn’s 1st birthday.  I’ve been blogging since before Blogger had custom templates, on the generic blue and green theme.  Before sponsors, giveaways, weekly memes, professional bloggers, and the like.  I’m not saying those things are bad, PLEASE hear me on that!  I’m just saying that I’ve been blogging since before blogging became popular.  I have seven years of my life invested in this blog.  The archives hold a treasure trove of memories and milestones, of ideologies and essays.  This blog is too much a part of me to ever stop…

But here’s the thing… Life goes on, munchkins grow up, and it’s a lot trickier trying to navigate the murky waters of a) finding the time to post, b) what is appropriate to post about Littles and their lives, and c) not posting for posting’s sake.  While I certainly don’t expect everyone to blog for the same reasons (as they shouldn’t, how boring this world would be if we were all the same), I adhere to certain “rules” for my own convictions sake.

  • I won’t be leaving this place.  Its mine.  My thoughts, beliefs, feelings, experiences.  This is where I come to process so many of my emotions on any number of topics.  I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to pack up and move on. 
  • I can’t promise that I’ll write as routinely as I once did.  I’ll write whenever inspiration hits and I love that so many want to read about our life.  Truthfully, I’m quite honored.  But I find those moments to be fewer and further between.
  • Anything that I share about the Littles and their own experiences in school, with friends, with family, will be done so with the permission of said Little.  I find that this has become much trickier as they grow older, but I must walk that tightrope carefully.
  • I find that grief is a funny thing.  It has sucked me dry, in every way possible.  I haven’t had the passion or inspiration to write here as much as I like.  I hope as healing continues, the joy I have in blogging will return.  But in the mean time, this beautiful blogger expresses much more eloquently than I could what I’m currently feeling.

Oh 2013, I have high hopes for you.  Granted, you won’t have to put forth too much effort to outdo 2012, but let’s not let that go to your head.  I’m borrowing my sister’s words and praying for a year of health and healing.

Mostly, I hope and pray for healing. Healing for my Dad as he recovers from his surgery on January 17th, and that we will hear that he is cancer free after his surgery. I would also pray for healing for so many that lost loved ones this past year. Those that lost loved ones to tragic and horrific shootings, and those that lost loved ones in other unexpected ways. I also pray for healing for families that are being torn apart through other circumstances.

I hope and pray for healthy babies. A healthy 3rd baby for us, healthy babies for my sister Alli and my friends, and most of all I pray for babies for all of those couples that have been dreaming and trying to have a family for many months or years.

2013.  Let’s do this!

I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.

9 comments

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Vicki
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1:46 PM delete

You always, always write so beautifully! I get happy whenever I see your name pop into my reader - I'm glad you will continue to post ... not just for me (yes I'm beling a bit selfish here) but for you ... all those years of your life documented here for you to reflect on, it would be sad to no longer have that I imagine ... so no matter how sporadic your posts get, It I know each post will be meaningful and wonderful!

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Jodi
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1:54 PM delete

Hoping everything goes well for your dad! And hoping 2013 in a happier year for you and your family!!

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Christine
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2:15 PM delete

I'm so with you! I feel like I could have written this post. My desire to blog has been lacking. I couldn't figure out if it was just life getting away from me, or like you said, another result of grieving.
I agree with what Vicki said above. You always write beautifully and I love following your blog, even if the posts won't be as often.

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Kendra
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2:31 PM delete

I can absolutely relate to struggling with writing/posting while grieving. Now that I'm two years out from having lost my dad, I look back at my archives and wish I'd written more about losing him and my journey through the foggy land of grief, but I just wasn't able to at the time. It. is. so. hard. :( I continue to hold you and your family in prayer.

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Meghan
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4:54 PM delete

I am so glad you will continue to post and share the wonderful memories that you and your family create:) I will also pray for your family as well.

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6:45 AM delete

First of all, loving the new look!

I really admire you as a blogger, a person, and friend. I started my blog back in 2008, so I feel invested as well. I love being able to look back and see how much my life and I have changed.

Hoping for a great 2013 for you!

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Lisa
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10:08 AM delete

Great post. It can be hard to find time to post (and do many other things!) with all that life has going on. I know I appreciate not posting just for post's sake, and any lack in quantity of posts will still be made up for in quality ;)

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Holly
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7:07 PM delete

This is a great post, Jenn! I, too, have been blogging for many years but I started on Xanga. There weren't any sponsors, giveaways, or memes. Just good 'ole blogging, a place to receive advice and vent if you needed to. I loved it, and I still love this blog now!!

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Mimsie
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10:03 AM delete

It's my observation that people can't Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and blog at the same time. If they have a passion for one of these, they have to choose it, and not spread themselves too thin.

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