Its Late

Tuesday, February 22, 2011 6 Comments A+ a-

I should be in bed, its been a long day. 

The Littles and I dropped Jon off at work early this morning.  It’s the 1st day of his five-day long training and he wanted to leave early to ensure that he got a good room at the training facility.  And while I understand not wanting to leave his truck in the parking lot all week long, its never fun to wake the kids, load them up, and drive across town long before we usually start the day.  But that’s what we did. 

After Hudson admired the truck Jon was taking to Denver, we sent him off with kisses and “Bye Daddy”s.  And our adventure began.

We’ve been doing this week-long training for seven years now.  Every year for the past seven years, Jon headed to Denver for a week long training and I played single-mom during the time he was gone.  I’ve done it as a mom of one, then two, then three.  I’ve done it while pregnant or nursing.  I’ve done it as a working mom and a mom on maternity leave.  And it was hard, I’m not going to lie.  Some years it was so overwhelming that I ended up packing us all up and moving in with my parents for the week.  Some years we managed just fine, albeit the kids had a very cranky and stressed out mama by day #5.

This is the first of many years as a mama of four.  And surprisingly I’m nowhere near as stressed out as I thought I’d be.  Don’t get me wrong.  I miss him!  Desperately.  There’s just something about hearing the garage door open, the doorknob turn, and the squeals of “Daddy’s home!” that makes the weight of responsibility slide off my shoulders.  I much prefer parenting with him here, sharing the job together.  But this year feels… right.

I don’t know if it’s the 1st time that I’m not working, nor is there the dread of working looming over my head.  I don’t know if our family just feels more settled.  As if we were waiting for Ashlynn to arrive and now that she’s here, we’re complete.  I don’t know if I feel more confident in my mothering skills.  Or if I’ve settled into the role as primary caregiver.

I don’t know the reason.  I just know that it’s the first time in seven years that I haven’t felt the urge to turn and run for my parents house.  My mom even offered to let us stay at their house, and while I love my parents, the idea didn’t appeal in the slightest.  I actually relished the idea of being cozy and snug in our house with my Littles.

And so, here I sit.  It’s almost midnight, the Littles have been tucked in their beds and sleeping for hours now.  I spent some time laughing and staring into the face of our fourth-born, eliciting smile after smile from our baby girl.  And when she finally conked out, I positioned her in the crook of my arm while I completed some blog designs.  As I look over my living room, I see that its cluttered with the remnants of child play.  Race tracks, bats, cars, dress-up clothes, and books litter the floor.  I should probably be straightening up instead of writing a blog post, but I can’t help but think it’s a portrait of a day well lived.

Its been a long day, and in six hours, we’ll begin again.  I sincerely can’t wait.

I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.

6 comments

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Joyfulness
AUTHOR
5:54 AM delete

Very nice. What a blessing. I'm encouraged to treat my hubby's next work trip with thankfulness!

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9:54 AM delete

You are definitely a supermom!!

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Marianne
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11:47 PM delete

Love you my friend!!:)

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Dareth
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10:42 AM delete

Love this post!

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Christine
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9:30 PM delete

Love to see you so content and happy right now. Good luck with the next 4 days-you'll do great!

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AndreaLeigh
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7:53 AM delete

you are a super mom. I don't know how you do it. DH is looking at a job that will have him working very long hours and being away a lot and I'm stressed just thinking about it.

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