Our Little Man

Tuesday, April 14, 2009 10 Comments A+ a-

He's on my heart tonight... my little man. I fear that I don't talk about him enough, or even that I won't be able to describe him accurately, but I want to try. So you can know him, as I know him.

Did you know that we're constantly stopped wherever we go? We play a little game before stepping out in public with Hudson, betting on how many times we'll be stopped. As his mother, I understand the draw, but I fear that I'm a little biased. Yet time and time again someone will stop us to tell us how charming, adorable, or beautiful Hudson is.

It could be his hair, that mop of blond curls just begs to be touched, ruffled, and combed through. The words, "He gets it from his dad" is always on the tip of my tongue as they shift their gaze from my straight, brown hair to his golden curls. It could be his big eyes, the eyes that are hazel but, more often than not, look brown. Not to mention that the length of his eyelashes is just too sinful to put on a little boy. It could be his smile. I have always known that if Jon and I were to have a little boy, he would have Jon's smile and I would be doomed. Its the perfect combination of I-know-I'm-adorable-and-can-get-away-with-anything and I-didn't-go-looking-for-trouble-it-found-me. Its the smile that I've never been able to say no to.

It could be those things, or it could be that they see his spirit, his personality, and they're just drawn to him. He has a way about him that makes everyone feel welcome, as though they are a friend. He has a good heart, a loving heart. When Devyn comes home from school or Awana's, Hudson will scream her name and run across the room for a hug. The same is true of any of his loved ones, just this afternoon he did the same to his Auntie Christine. He is a lover and my cuddle-bug. Every morning, every nap time, even just because, he will crawl into my lap and wrap his arms around me for a good 10-15 minute cuddle. He pulls both Jon and I close for kisses and loves stroking our cheeks with his.

"Hockey" means both hockey and golf, "football" means both football and basketball, and no matter how many times we try to correct him, these names have stuck. I find myself saying hockey more often than golf. I was so nervous when I found out we were going to have a boy, I'd been raised with all girls and had no experience with little men. But oh, this one has turned my life upside down and I couldn't imagine my life without him. He is the perfect balm in the midst of uncertainty.

Between Hudson's 15 and 18-month check-up, he stopped growing. He's maintained his weight, but it did not go up. We were sent to a nutritionist and after a thorough discussion of Hudson's eating habits and new healthy eating tips, we were given the all-clear. Then we had his 22-month check-up and again, no growth. Dr. Susie was concerned and ordered blood tests of all kinds, all of which came back normal. We breathed a sigh of relief. But Dr. Susie wasn't done yet, issuing a referral to a pediatric endocrinologist. After probing for what it was they'd be looking for, we opted against it. Our main reason being that we'd say no to any kind of growth hormone that they'd want to put Hudson on. Instead Pediasure has become a staple in our home and Hudson has two "special" drinks a day, thus ensuring our little man is getting an additional 500 calories every day.

Four months later and I was called back into the doctor's office for a weight check. I was fairly confident, after all, I'd seen with my own eyes that Hudson was growing, some of his pants didn't fit anymore. With a sinking heart, I frowned as I realized that Hudson had only gained a pound and a half in four months, well eight months if you count back. My 26-month-old baby boy currently weighs 20lbs and 14ozs.

And so now we wait. I am dreading, yet anxious, for that call from Dr. Susie tomorrow. The call where she states her concerns, where we agree to take him to the endocrinologist, when I get to ask some questions and, hopefully, get some answers. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, if I wasn't concerned, because I am. Very.

There are a couple of things I know for sure. One, he is active. The only time he is not moving is when he is sleeping, seriously. So I'm pretty sure he's burning up whatever calories he is taking in. Two, I'm fairly certain that this is just Hudson's genetic make-up. After all, I am only 5'2" and my dad is 5'6". Two of my sisters fell off their growth curves as toddlers and were also referred to pediatric endocrinologists, only to find out that they were just small.

But I am scared, and concerned. And truth be told, I just want some answers.

I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.

10 comments

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Kendra
AUTHOR
11:13 PM delete

I'll be praying for you and hoping for the best as you guys wait to find out answers. Thank you for sharing so that we can pray.

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Amazing Racer
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7:26 AM delete

Praying peace for you and Jon and some answers as well.

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7:44 AM delete

Our Noah (now 2 1/2 and 27 1/2 pounds) stopped growing or actually never started growing until 4 months old. It was a horrible feeling! He also had a rash covering his body (literally head to toe). He was in the hospital for a little under a month while they (several doctors and specialists) tried to figure out what was going on with our little man. We ended up putting him on a very special, very expensive formula- deciding he had a food protein allergy. That seemed to do the trick. He gradually started putting on the weight! It was scary though. I felt horrible as his mother and blamed myself (partly because others were blaming me too). Even though I knew I had done everything 'right' when it came to the well-being of my new son. It was still a very,very dark time in my life. Something I never want to re-live. I know you'll figure out what's going on with Hudson. I personally think he probably is just small and it's a genetic thing (like you mentioned). I bet all he needs is some time. He'll grow...in his time. I do know how scary it can be though...I'll be praying.

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Melody
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11:27 AM delete

I'll be praying for Hudson and mommy's nerves. As you've stated in this entry, I'm sure it's just genetics and that he's just a smaller boy than "average".

My husband had a hard time growing as a child. He would grow a little taller but it took forever for him to gain weight. It took him 20 years to get to 90 lbs. He'll turn 30 next week and has just recently reached 130 lbs. at 5'10". I'm sure that one day when we have our own children that we'll be facing similar issues, as I was also small as a child.

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Jaime
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2:28 PM delete

Oh Jen, I'll be praying for you! I want to comfort you, though. Eli is also an active, skinny little boy! He barely puts on weight, either.He eats and eats, but seems to 'run it all off'. He's almost three, and weighing about 27 lbs, yet our doctor isn't concerned. At two, he probably weighed almost exactly what Hudson does now! Take courage---and I'll be praying that everything turns out find for Hudson!

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CPT Mom
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3:15 PM delete

Loving you guys and praying for peace in this time of questions.

You guys have raised him to be such a great little guy thus far! I know you will make the best decisions regarding testing.

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Paula
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8:22 PM delete

Praying for your little guy and good results and answers.

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Tamara
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11:21 PM delete

Praying for you tonight. I can understand in so many ways.
Should you need or want the help--I have LOADS of healthy, weight-gaining recipes. It's just part of life here.

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Melissa King
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4:01 PM delete

Cody is the same way. He is almost 3 and weighs 23 pounds. I think he only gained about 2 pounds in a year and a half. Pediasure is also a staple in our house, which sucks...it's so expensive. Yes, they are so very similar, Cody and Hudson. Active active little lovers. And Cody also gets stopped everywhere we go with his red hair and brown eyes with the never ending lashes. They are too cute. Oh, and Cody asked to play with Hudson today. He needs to come over!!! :) Hang in there, I am sure he is just itty bitty like his momma! The same was true for code man.

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3:59 PM delete

Mikkhi weighs almost 25# and is almost 3 years old. I freaked out about his growth and then just gave it to God and I know that he is healthy and happy. He's still active, still growing, and still happy. I will pray for your family. Hudson looks great!

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