Some Musings of Mine

Thursday, July 10, 2008 4 Comments A+ a-

I find myself in a new position regarding this blog. For the first time in the two and a half years that I started blogging, I find myself hesitating to write what I want. I always knew that I was putting myself out there for all the virtual world to read and every day I’m discovering just how many in my life (friends, family, coworkers, etc.) stop by the site for a visit. But every so often someone will say something to me and I find myself pausing to ask myself if I’m really as comfortable being as open and vulnerable as I thought I was. I don’t know. There’s so much I want to write about and so much I want to share but for the first time, I’m second-guessing myself. So, until I can figure things out within my own head and heart, I’m afraid this blog may be staying with the superficial for now…

Some highlights from our trip to North Carolina:

  • While Devyn can be cautious when it comes to meeting new people or new situations, she is a completely different girl when it comes to life experiences. One day they pumped up this huge inner tube to pull behind the boat and Devyn was the first one to ride on it. She had both Uncle Josh and Uncle Brock sitting on either side of her and you couldn’t have wiped the smile from her face!
  • Almost every evening, we pulled into this one bay area where the water was about 30-40 feet deep and so very warm. We would float there for hours and both Devyn and Hudson turned into little water babies in this bay. My 3-and-a-half-year-old girl would climb onto the back of the boat and jump into the water over and over again. And while Hudson took his time adjusting to the water, it was in this bay that he finally allowed us to hold him in the water where he could splash to his heart’s content.
  • On 4th of July, we went to a nearby golf course and to watch the fireworks display. As always, Devyn hated the noise and wanted to go home, so she and I hunkered down on the grass with her daddy’s coat covering her head. Every so often, she’d lift her head and tell me when she saw a pink one, only to duck under the coat again. Hudson, on the other hand, loved every minute of it and tried “catching” the fireworks as they drifted down. Towards the end of the display, I leaned over and reminded Jon’s that I’ve been pregnant for three out of the last five 4th of Julys.
  • It always warms my heart to see Jon’s brothers interact with my children; I realize how very lucky my children are and how much they are loved. Josh and Brock obviously enjoy spending time with them and get such a kick out of the things they say and do. It was also the first time that girlfriends of the brothers came too (yes, it’s a little unnerving having to give up my “only-girl” crown) and Devyn loved having more girls around.

Some highlights since our return:

  • I have definitely reached that stage in my pregnancy where people are starting to wonder “Is she? Or isn’t she?” I have had numerous coworkers come up within the past few days to ask, always with a hesitant smile. I’ve smiled at them and announced that, yes, we are expecting our third. My news is usually met with congratulations, but there have been a few comments wondering if this was planned or not. I just smile…
  • Jon returned to work, after an almost two-week vacation, to find an email that he’d received a raise. I am so proud of him! He is in a job he loves, he is such a hard worker, and he definitely deserves this. Great job Babe!
  • On Tuesday night, a group of girls went out to dinner for a birthday celebration and it was a wonderful night! It was so refreshing to sit down with other Christian women and discuss both the blessings and pangs of trying to be a Christian wife and mother. It was just as therapeutic as going to a counselor… seriously! I walked away with a whole new perspective on things.

I think that’s it for now… I want to leave you with one of my favorite pictures from North Carolina. (Thanks for the photo, Mom.) This is all three brothers and Devyn and Hudson. Do you notice how Devyn has her arm wrapped around Hudson’s neck? He leaned his head on her shoulder and the two of them stayed that way for a good five minutes before Hudson finally shrugged her arm off. It was too adorable for words!

I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.


Write comments
2:14 PM delete

I totally understand your feelings of uneasiness. I find myself going back and forth about what to share on my own blog somedays. I just wanted to say (I know it doesn't make a difference) that I have always enjoyed reading your thoughts and always come away encouraged when you share the deeper side of your heart. That being said, I also enjoy reading your random reflections as well.

So gald you all had such a nice trip; it sounds wonderful!
Much love, Elizabeth

2:19 PM delete

I can relate to that too.

Glad you had such a nice trip! :)

Haley Anderson
2:32 PM delete

Oh that picture is beautiful!

You have a talent for writing so beautifully and I really do enjoy reading your blog. You make me feel normal! You are wonderful and I am blessed to know you!

8:18 PM delete

I'm hesitant too about blogging now - actually have been for awhile. I think it started when my husband was deployed. I just couldn't blog "I feel like selling my children - any buyers?" when so much of my family was reading and already fretting about us. :) So now it's just silly kid stories.

(I do have another blog just for my friends to read. Email me if you're interested in reading it.)