Growing Into Me

Sunday, April 13, 2008 10 Comments A+ a-

Its going to be a busy week on the blog; I know it because I have a lot to say. For those that just come for the pictures, I have some fun ones coming up this week so stay tuned. But for tonight, I have to focus on something that has been building up within the past few weeks.

For so long, I have dreaded the big 3-0. Now granted, I have another year and a half to go before I hit that big milestone but for the first time, I'm no longer dreading it. Because I have a feeling that my thirties are going to be ten times better than my twenties.

I realized lately that I'm growing into myself. Most of my twenties has been spent trying to fit into one niche or another; the college coed, the working woman, the dating couple, the engaged couple, the newlywed, the newly pregnant, the new mama, the working mom, etc. I've been trying to figure out who I am, where I fit in, and how to keep everyone happy. For so long, I've tried to see how I fit into this life and that, my friends, is tiring.

However, something has happened within the past few weeks and I find myself blooming. I'm not sure if its "awakening" from the post-partum depression stupor that I've been in for the past year, or if I'm just getting comfortable in my own skin. Regardless, I am happy with who I am; I find that I'm no longer making apologies for anything; and I'm relishing in the gifts that God has given me. I am can handle some things; I can do an okay job with others; but there are some things I excel at and gosh-darn it, I'm proud of those things.

This may seem like such a superficial post, perhaps even prideful. But I just can't explain the freedom I'm feeling at this moment, relishing in who I am. I have gifts, gifts that I've been given for a reason. Those gifts create an identity outside of being a sister, a friend, a daughter, Jon's wife, or Devyn and Hudson's mother. It's an identity all my own. Do you know how awesome it is to know that God put His fingerprint on my life?! That I am exactly who God has made me to be?! He makes no mistakes; He makes only masterpieces. And with the that knowledge, I can only use ME to reflect God's glory. Oh, what a magnificent God I serve!

Yes, I think the 30's are going to be amazing! I have a feeling its going to be the most freeing and growing time in my life. My only thought is... bring it on!!

I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.

10 comments

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Melissa King
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11:20 PM delete

Great post! I have been struggling with the same things lately. I feel like ever since I became a wife and mother, I have forgotten/lost who I am. I am struggling to get that back. your post gives me hope! Thanks jenn!

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Liberty
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6:57 AM delete

The 30s are amazing! You start realizing, "Wow! I didn't know as much as I thought I did in my late teens early 20s!" LOL

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Rachel
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7:29 AM delete

That's awesome, Jenn. I'm really excited for you. Much love to you on your journey!

~~Rachel
www.nothinggold.net

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Sarah
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7:42 AM delete

Amen sister! I'm feeling much the same way about the 30's approaching. I feel like the 20's have been a stretching and growing time, and the thirties, while there will still be stretching and growing, will be more of a blooming time. Here's to blooming!
Love, Sarah

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Becoming Me
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9:03 AM delete

Great post. I too am going through a journey of discovery. I hit 34 this year and let me tell you it keeps getting better. Yeah, I like how my face looked at 25 better than I do now, but my mind, my heart, my spiritual growth, praise God it is better and better.

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9:17 AM delete

That is wonderful to hear. It is not superficial to shout for JOY when God is giving you peace and strengthening you. Thank you for telling us the happy times as well as the tough.

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marsie
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9:39 AM delete

In no way is it prideful to say what you feel when it is a gift!! I agree that when Heavenly Father has blessed you with those gifts and blessings, and we start to fully realize what he did for each of us individually to help make us-ourselves-that is a reason to be filled with his love, hope, and JOY!!!:) I love you and am filled with JOY for you:)

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Mary
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10:43 AM delete

You are going to love your 30's. I felt the same way but I love it here! (and unfortunately am almost out of them)

I'm so excited what God is doing for you! :)

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Kamma
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2:33 PM delete

I just want you to know how proud I am of you, Jenn! I'm also so proud and happy that I've been there with you through a lot of those "phases", from 3rd grade till now! I love you!

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Wendy
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4:20 PM delete

the 30's are good!

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