My Support Network

Wednesday, January 30, 2008 4 Comments A+ a-

My mother always reiterated the importance of girlfriends to us as we were growing up. She constantly told us how there were many times in her life that she would not have survived without the support and encouragement of her friends. For example, my parents went through a really rough patch during my teen years and by rough, I mean bad. There’s no need for details, suffice it to say I am constantly amazed at where God has brought my family. I’ve often asked my mom how she managed to survive those years, the obvious answer was God but she also attributed it to her friends. The women who were “God” to her in tangible ways; offering a listening ear, being a shoulder to cry on, encouraging her to be the Godly wife and mother that she was called to be, etc. I shudder to think what might have happened to our family if Mom had not had that support network during those years.

Now that I’m a wife and mother, I’ve embraced my mom’s advice and have surrounded myself with women that I’m fortunate enough to call friends. Jon is an incredible father, husband, and friend, in fact, he’s my best friend, but lets me honest here, he is just not able to relate to me in ways that I need. That’s where my friends come in. I am so thankful for the ladies that I can call at any time, any moment, just to hear me freak out about whether or not I’ve damaged my children for life. I am so thankful for the women that will allow me to bare my soul, a safe place where I’m not condemned, nor judged, just accepted. I am so grateful that I have women who will hold me accountable to the truths that have been laid out for me in my roles as a wife and mother. Women who I can share a good laugh with, women who can appreciate the demand in raising toddlers, women who I can cry with, women who I have history with, women who when I leave them, I feel refreshed, recharged, and relieved that I’m not alone in feeling the way I do.

In the past week, I have had two friend-dates; one with a friend from my past, we go back all the way to second grade, and the other with a friend who came into my life when we married cousins. The first friend is getting ready to move across the ocean in a few months and I get teary just thinking about her not being in the same town. It was wonderful to hear the excitement in her voice, to see her about to embark on a new adventure in her life. She is a woman that though we don’t see each other as often as I’d like, we are always able to pick up right where we left off; complete opposites of the other but still able to finish each other’s sentences. The cousin-friend and I spent much of our dinner laughing, commiserating with each other about the difficulties of being a wife and mother, empathizing with our struggles with to be the best we can but always feeling like we’ve fallen short. As I hugged her good-bye, it was bittersweet, knowing that the time away from our families was well worth it. I went home light-hearted and rejuvenated, ready to tackle my roles in a new light.

These are just a couple of examples of the friends in my lives. Each friend adds something different to my life, like spices they all complement each other and complement me. Each is so special, so important to me, that I’d feel like my life would incomplete without them. When life gets hard, when I feel discouraged, I’m reminded how truly blessed I am when I’m able to call a friend up and hear the exact thing I needed to hear at that moment. It is hard work maintaining these friendships but I’m thankful for an understanding husband, a husband that’s willing to watch the kids when I need to duck out for a coffee date, a husband that laughingly asks me if I need a “insert-friend’s-name-here- fix?” I think he understands and appreciates the “new” me when I return from such dates. And my dear friends, you know who you are; you bless my life in ways that I cannot begin to explain. I hope you know that each of your friendships has left a fingerprint on my heart, which in turn touches and blesses my family. Thank you for the privilege of allowing me to call you friend.


I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.

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HappyMama
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1:58 PM delete

I love your mom's advice! It really makes sense to have that network of support and it helps you to not only be a better mom and wife but a more complete person. I am glad that you have friends like that.

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Sarah
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6:22 PM delete

Right back at you sister! I don't know what I'd do without you and the other "sisters", whether by blood not, in my life. Spices, I love that annalogy!
Love, Sarah

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Amazing Racer
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9:29 PM delete

Yay for girlfriends. So important in a woman's life!

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Anonymous
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4:27 PM delete

I love you Jenn, and always will. Nor matter how far away my body is, I will be there for you.
Kamma

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