One-Year Anniversary

Friday, October 06, 2006 8 Comments A+ a-

It's my one year anniversary of blogging! 12 months ago my mother-in-law forwarded the blog of one of Jon's cousins, Jess, and immediately I was hooked. It has been such a wonderful outlet for me to process thoughts, emotions, or just relay family stories. I thought that in celebration of this event, I'd re-post my very first post from my original blog.

Every day draws me closer to Devyn’s 1st birthday and a sense of loss fills me. I’ve tried explaining to my dear, sweet husband why I feel this way. And although he tries his best to understand (bless his heart), he just can’t. I find myself drawing closer to my girlfriends who have been, or are currently, going through this. After all, it seems that only another mother’s heart can understand the tug-of-war going on inside.

On one hand, I love seeing Devyn grow and change in front of my eyes. I watch as she takes daring step, after daring step around the coffee table; I exclaim, in pride, over her accomplishment of turning around all by herself; I laugh as she makes new sounds and tries mimicking our words or the barking dogs. I sit in wonder as I watch this beautiful girl, a girl that Jon and I created, explore this world. I can’t describe the feelings of happiness, pride, or love that overwhelms me.

But then I sit back and I think back to a year ago; when I was getting big with pregnancy and wishing and hoping for this baby to finally make her appearance in the world because I was done with being pregnant. Even though I loved the kicks, the dancing, and the constant trips to the bathroom; I just wanted her here in the flesh with us. And I remember the doctor placing her in my arms and thinking, how tiny she was! I loved how fragile and helpless she was; I loved that only I (or so it seemed) could answer her needs.

So as I watch Devyn Paige get more independent and more daring, I can’t help but remember her baby days with a wistful sigh.

Devyn Paige, one year ago, at 11 months old.

I’m a coffee drinking, book reading, laundry procrastinating, husband and children loving, mess of a woman who believes that chips and salsa can fix anything. We have chickens running around the backyard, a mountain of dishes in the sink, and on any given morning, I have at least 10 school forms that need my signature or initials. It’s a crazy life {I prefer to call it controlled chaos}, but its ours.

8 comments

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HappyMama
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1:53 PM delete

Happy Anniversary! I really enjoy reading your blog, looking at the photos and catching up with what's going on in your life.

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andi
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2:46 PM delete

Happy Anniversary! I don't know if I have ever commented on your blog, but I had to today because your post seemed like it was written for me! My daughter just turned one a few weeks ago and you described so perfectly what I have been feeling. It truly is bittersweet! Thanks for sharing your heart :)

P.S. I got the link to your blog from Amy (amy-ohmy), my sister-in-law.

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Amanda
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3:31 PM delete

I had no idea that blogging would become such a wonderful thing for me. It is so much fun getting to meet beautiful women like you!

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3:43 PM delete

[wistful sigh]

Missing the baby stage here, too. I'll probably keep my youngest in a crib till she's five.

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Brony
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9:40 PM delete

Happy Anniversary. That is very exciting. Today is my 100th post, so I know your excitement. I can't wait to reach a year. I agree it is a wonderful outlet.

I understand your feelings. It is a mixed blessing. They grow and change as time slips away. It is such a wonderful moment when you realize that the little baby is part of you. It is your miracle.

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Courtney
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9:51 PM delete

I forgot how tiny Devyn used to be! She looks like a completely different person now.

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Anonymous
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1:12 PM delete

Congrats! I'm so glad that I met you and that you're a lovely blogger:) Devyn is such a munchkin in this picture!

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Overwhelmed!
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10:17 PM delete

Oh, congrats on reaching your 1 year blogging anniversary!

What a beauty Devyn was a year ago and now today!

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